Self-care shifts for fall #fibro

Ah arthritis season has arrived. Time to shift into my fall/winter morning routine where I need heat on my SI joints and to stretch & rotate all joints before I can even get out of bed. Joint pain is worse for me in a lot of ways than post workout pain. Sore muscles make me cranky, sure, but they don’t make me feel like my spine can’t support my body. Getting up and down, standing, carrying, lifting, walking & driving all feel precarious when my arthritis flares up. If I don’t tend to it, a fibro flare can follow which lands me in bed for extended numbers of hours.

So what’s different about my fall winter self-care than spring/summer? Heat needs to be handy at all times. I stash thermacare pads in my car, bags and office. I have to make extra time available just to get up out of bed. I warm up my joints in bed actually and then move right to my yoga mat for kundalini spine warmups and sun salutations under my sun lamp. Where the summer I did most of my workouts in the morning, my body can’t handle this now. Midday or evening workouts are better. They are longer, slower, less intense. I also pay extreme attention to posture and body mechanics to ease the strain as much as possible as I go through my day. I wear layers and keep blankets and heat handy all day. I stay as warm as possible, and I take frequent breaks to warm up my joints so they don’t get stiff. And I warm up my bed at night with heating pads, so there is no cold shock to my system when I get in.

 

An email experiment

With my new discernment about urgency and importance, I decided to do an experiment to wrangle my email inbox into something manageable. Prior to my chat with Kyeli, I was always trying to clear out the inbox before I responded to the emails that needed care and attention. I often ran out of time before I got to the important stuff.

I decided to reclaim my inbox by using Google’s Priority Inbox tool. First, I scan my full inbox, and I delete anything I have no intention of reading. (I’ve even taken myself off some lists to make this a quicker step.) Then, I move everything social (politics, my spiritual community, my friends, family) to a special folder I can indulge in when I’m not working.

Wow does that clear up a lot of emotional space for focusing on work!

Then I look for all the actual emails from live people (not newsletters or advertisements) and flag those so they pop to the top of my Priority Inbox. I star anything personal and important so it doesn’t get lost either. Finally, I demote anything that doesn’t require a response or that I want to read at some point but not right now to a Review and File folder.

Now it’s clear which emails are truly important to tend to right away - they are at the top of my list!

I work my way down though those tiers, only getting to the less important stuff if I have time for it. It’s felt so good to be tending to the important stuff and no longer being caught up in the urgency created by modern life.

I’ve been doing this for a couple of weeks now, and I’m finding myself getting a significantly larger amount of work done in less time.  Naturally, the discerning what is really important vs what is urgent or busywork has overflowed into all aspects of when I am working.  I’m staying focused on task instead of distracted by my online social life and real life.  I’m impressed with how much more efficiently I am getting work down.  

Getting more work done in less time and having more time to connect with people, relax, meditate or do art has been awesome and inspiring.  Wondering what I meant by discerning the difference between urgent and importance?Check out my blog post from last week.

Workshop with @AQSecurity4U on Financial Wellbeing for your Biz

October 19, 2011 6:45pm at The Healing Center in Beverly, MA

Learn the five biggest financial mistakes that business owners make and how to avoid them in an interactive workshop facilitated by Andrea Quagenti, an independent Certified Financial Planner TM with Financial Planning Solutions, Inc. in Newton, MA.

Come to this workshop, “The 5 Biggest Financial Mistakes Business Owners Make and How to Avoid Them,” with an open-minded perspective on your personal business practices and you’ll gain insight into successful financial practices. You will also gain knowledge about how to achieve greater success and increase your earnings potential.

Register on the North Shore Holistic Health Professionals Meetup site here. Cost: $10.

About the Speaker: Andrea M. Quagenti, an independent Certified Financial Planner TM (CFP®), takes a comprehensive approach to financial planning to help elevate her clients to new standards of living and savings. Andrea educates and inspires clients at all income levels to embrace new concepts of financial wellness. By focusing on “big picture” thinking with careful attention to detail and quantitative analysis, Andrea focuses on partnering with her clients to design customized plans that help ensure long-term financial security. Highly credentialed, Andrea offers more than 13 years of financial experience, including nearly 10 years at Fidelity Investments, along with the most thorough training available to achieve her status as a CFP®. A graduate of Salem State College with a concentration in finance, Andrea extends her passion for money management to many others. She offers pro bono financial coaching to patients of The Dana Farber Cancer Institute. For more information, visit http://www.fps2.com/.

Register on the North Shore Holistic Health Professionals Meetup site here. Cost: $10.

Looking for those missing pieces?

Does your heart ache to uncover, understand and overcome the hidden fears and habits that hold you back from success? Do you want to learn how to reliably access the wisdom, insight and intuition of your core self? Would you like to resolve the core issues blocking you from reaching your potential? Do you need insight, inspiration and a workable action plan to turn your vision into a reality? 

All of these and more are what previous clients have gained by going through the Clearing your Path for Success program. Next session starts October 15, 2011.

The 6 weeks of the Clearing your Path for Success program includes weekly lessons emailed to you, 6 class recordings that explain the weekly lessons in depth, plus the Clearing your Path for Success ebook and 5 guided meditations set to music.

Also includes FREE 6 weeks access to the Heart-Centered Entrepreneur Online Forum where you can post, share and interact with others in the program, participate in a weekly general disussion phone call (Sundays 8pm EST), submit your weekly lesson response for feedback from Joanna.  

The optional Apprenticeship Mastermind Group includes 6 weekly 1 hr group calls on Wednesdays at 12pm EST with mastermind participants to discuss the weekly lesson topics, troubleshoot roadblocks and challenges and receive live feedback from Joanna and participants about your business. Limited to 6. 

Also optional, 3 hours of Private Coaching with Joanna includes private 45 or 90 minute phone calls with Joanna to receive personalized guidance, assistance and strategy for your business. These are scheduled at your convenience. 

How to get started:

The next session starts October 16, 2011. 

All the Registration details are located here.

Or you can explore the Learn at-home version of the Clearing your Path for Success. The Learn at home program includes an e-book and 5 guided meditations for $31.99. Details here.

Did you catch my newsletter last week?

It’s all about why it’s still important to know the neighboring businesses and my theory on why heart-centered entrepreneurs are specially designed for community and collaboration instead of viewing each other as threatening competition.

Read the newsletter on the archive at Constant Contact here!

Clearing out my Inner junk

This is an old blog post from November 7, 2009. It’s my story, and it’s still relevant.

I spent many years observing and working in the wellness industry before I wound up enough courage to launch my own practice helping others.  For a long time, I found it more comfortable to help others on a volunteer basis and to be the support person in a wellness office instead of stepping into the confident shoes of a practitioner who trusts in his or her own knowledge and skills to help others in exchange for money.

For years, since the mid-1990’s, I had volunteered as a mentor for other women with non-profit organizations, and on the side, I offered holistic health coaching and Reiki healing to friends and family. This was in addition to working, often full-time for others in the health and wellness industry. This volunteer practice was no hobby. I devoted many hours per week to helping, guiding and facilitating healing and growth of others to the point where my “real” job became an impediment to the very important healing work I was doing. 

I reached a crossroads in 2007 where I had to make a choice - there simply was not enough time in my life to balance marriage & family, full-time volunteering and full-time work. Nobody in my household was happy with how overbooked I was, so with the support of my husband (at the time), I left my full-time job to launch a practice that both served others and brought in the income that my household needed.

I didn’t consciously know it at the time, but hanging up a shingle as a real mentor, practitioner or coach meant that I had to face and clean out societal conditioning and self-worth issues.

With each step I took towards “legitimizing” my practice, another fear, limiting belief, or doubt would pop up.  The first six months were mostly full of trial and error, facing fears and limiting beliefs and my own personal growth into the role of practitioner. 

In addition to the inner work that I had to go through in order to confidently offer my services to others, I had to learn how to run a business too. 

There are so many authorities on how to run a business out there - it was confusing and overwhelming.  I listened to what the experts said, and I tried this or that technique, bought client attraction and marketing systems from “experts”, and doubted that I really had what it takes to practice in a way that served others and myself.

I was able to build my practice quickly in comparison to statistics about how many clients practitioners usually line up the first year.  But, after injuring myself towards the end of the first year with overwork and poor body mechanics at the Reiki table, I realized that the only way this business was going to really work for me and support my life was if it was built on my values and aligned with what was healthy for me.

With the help of my mentor, I was able to go within to find my own Inner Voice of Authority and start making decisions and taking actions that truly aligned my practice with my beliefs and values.

When some of my Reiki students were ready to start practices of their own, I found a deeper calling than I had heard before.  I realized that I could assist them in the process of becoming a practitioner and business owner by showing them how to listen to their Inner Voice of Authority and make each decision along the way from a place of personal health and empowerment instead of spending months, maybe years, listening to all the experts about what they should be doing to become a successful practitioner. 

As I’ve described about my own journey to become a practitioner, there’s a transformation process that every practitioner has to go through, like a caterpiller becoming a butterfly.  Most practitioners are motivated to do this good work out of an altruistic desire to help others, and it is very easy to find people willing to let you help them for free.  The transformation from volunteer work to paid, professional work requires a shift in perspective and understanding on the deepest level so that her energy as a practitioner attracts paying clients who love to work with her.

My apprenticeship takes new practitioners as well as established practitioners who are stuck or blocked in some way through a step by step process to identify their true calling, find their Inner Voice of Authority, identify the Roadblocks (fears, limiting beliefs, external pressure) and work through them to clear their own path for success. 

I want my clients to have the courage and confidence to do the work they love and feel called to do in a way that not only serves others but supports their own lives as well. 

In the first run of this program in 2009, we uncovered some very deep insights into how to make decisions from your Core authentic self and be in business from a heart and soul centered place. In addition, we’ve experienced the incredible power of shared creativity to break through limiting beliefs and habits via the collaborative model of the mastermind.  

One of the most powerful aspects we explored and shifted was the prevalent limiting belief about wellness practitioners from all modalities - that being of service to others in a beautiful, spirit centered way is only possible if you sacrifice your financial wellbeing or rely on someone else or a “real job” to take care of your financial responsibilities.  This belief does not serve practitioners, and it does not serve their clients.  Hiding behind volunteer work prevents practitioners from truly blossoming into their fully empowered powerful selves.

I’m working with my clients and my mentor to create a new model of working from your authentic self that allows you to be of service to others and to yourself.  Clearing your Path for Success, the first half of my Heart-Centered Entrepreneur Apprenticeship, runs again this October. It starts October 15, 2011.

It will take you step by step through this transformation so that you can start building momentum and attracting energy and clientele you need in your practice.

The best part about the program, in my opinion, is that it empowers you to find and overcome your Roadblocks, access your Inner Voice, and make Decisions from your heart.

Urgency vs importance & new commitments to the health of my business

Last week in my coaching call with Kyeli, we discussed the difference between urgency and importance.  WHOA! I so needed clarity around this.

We explored how so much of the demands on our time and attention from technology are often urgent, but not important.

All those beeps, rings, and songs from our computers and mobile phones are screaming out for our attention, but are they truly as important as they claim to be? No, most of the time they are not.  We respond to our devices like they are those machines in the hospital monitoring vital signs.  Yet, our mobile devices really aren't giving us information that's as crucial as vital signs, even if we respond to them as if they are.

This got me to thinking about how much of my time and attention is diverted from what is really important to my business as I automatically respond to the urgency coming from all directions. As I think about it, I see I have a terrible habit of wanting to “deal” with the demanding stuff first, believing I couldn't relax and focus on the important stuff until the demands were gone. But just like the kitchen sink, my inbox always needs tending. It will never be completely clean, and it's just setting myself up for non-productivity if I only relax and work on important stuff when it's empty.


I discovered that even though I easily ignore my devices when another person is in the room with me so I can give them my complete attention, I am totally rude to myself!

I allow my attention to be diverted from what I'm working on when beeps, songs and chimes go off.  So, this is why the important stuff keeps being postponed. I spend my time trying to manage what's coming at me and get everything to "settle down", instead of taking control of my situation by setting boundaries.


The stuff I value, the self-care for my business, never quite gets the attention and focus that it needs as I run around feeling important because I am caught up in a cycle of urgency.

And yet, I know from first hand experience that if I don’t do my personal self-care (yoga, meditation, Reiki, wholesome foods, exercise, etc), my body starts to feel painy and my sleep isn’t great. Basically I feel crappy, and it's hard to focus and be attentive, creative and great at my work.  So after a lot of years of practicing, I’ve got fantastic self-care habits programmed to come first in my life. It's a requirement, not a luxury.

However, I need to reprogram my habits when it comes to my business. I've not been prioritizing the business-care things that need to come first (staying connected with clients and community, finishing projects on time, returning important emails & phone calls, keeping up with promoting and attracting clients, creative dates with myself, sacred focus time etc..) in order to keep my business thriving and growing.


Duh!  I was so busy being anxious that I forgot to stay on track.  Oops! I bet I'm not the only entrepreneur that has done this.  Have you?

I let myself get caught up in the urgency and demands technology makes possible. I feel pretty silly as I look at it now, but I know it’s totally true. I was conditioned like Pavlov's dog. Beep! Check-my-phone-reflex. Oy. Let's break that cycle, please.

I am seeing clearly now how much my business needs self-care just like my mind, body and spirit do.  It needs stronger boundaries, healthier habits and quality interactions. It's definitely time to create some new business-love-and-care routines so my business feels as great as I do.  It’s just a matter of carving out the time and attention to tending to those things FIRST, and leaving the busywork for in between moments, while you’re on hold listening to terrible music or heck just throw it out.


So I'm making some commitments to my business.  

I'm putting the important stuff first. I'm making my work time sacred and not allowing distractions to affect my focus. I'm evaluating whether I need to be on so many newsletters, following so many people on Twitter, Facebook and Google + and paring down so the focus on what's important is there. I'm shutting the constant alerts on my phone off so that it's not tempting me while I'm working on important stuff.  I'm keeping my email and browsers closed while I'm writing, working on curriculum and creative projects so that I don't get pulled into an interesting but irrelevant conversation.  I'm staying off all devices for some part of the work day so I can meditate and be creative without distractions.


Oh, it is so worth it.

I’m finding my days more peaceful and productive already. 

Do you want to be a Reiki Master?

There is just one spot left in the Reiki Master Certification starting on Sunday. Could it be yours?

Reiki Master Teacher Joanna Scaparotti has been practicing and teaching Reiki locally since 2003. She teaches Usui Shiki Ryoho Reiki along with her own guided Reiki techniques. Her training emphasize developing intuition and trusting insights from your Inner Wisdom. 

The Reiki Master Program consists of 100 hours of training over the course of 6 months. The class meets approximately twice a month for a total of 40 hours of classroom training and 60 hours of home practice in the form of homework and client case-studies (approximately 3-4 hrs per week).


The rest of the details here.

Reclaiming my personal power

I spent several hours in meditation doing a healing the other morning. I often get a “calling” to do a healing. When I sit down in meditation to answer the call, I don’t really know where it’s going to go or what’s going to happen.The meditation happens the way it wants to happen, and I am just a conduit for the love and healing energy.

I am simply a facilitator and my job is to witness and hold space for the healing.

The healing journey started off with sending love, light and peace to those who suffered in some way from the September 11, 2001 attacks.

Then it got really personal.

I believe that in healing the personal, we send ripples out into the world that bring love and healing to others who have suffered in similar ways. The energy from healing, prayer, sending love or Reiki reverberates out into the world, just like the frightening energy from hate crimes and violence do.

These deliberate acts of healing energy are so needed to bring balance back into our world.

The healing session took me on a journey back through the last 10 years and beyond in my own life. I discovered that there was a part of me that identified with being a victim of unseen forces. The attacks of September 11, 2001 served to amplify those feelings in myself and anyone else who was already resonating with victimization. Today’s healing journey was to release that association and reclaim my personal power and hopefully send ripples of empowerment out into the world.

I’m going to be really honest with you about my journey. It’s super personal, and it feels a lot vulnerable to share it. My heart wants to share, so here we go.

So many times in my life I have come close to reaching my goals and then something always screws things up.

Until I did the healing work this morning, I thought of it as an unseen force outside of my control that was always preventing me from succeeding. Sometimes, I would blame my ex-husband. As I journeyed back through memories of all of the times this happened, I discovered it went way back even before my ex-husband. It went back to the transition from junior high to high school.

It went back to a point in time where I decided that it was safer to not be too smart or too successful so that I wasn’t singled out and emotionally tortured. Even though I tried to hide my true self, it still would pop out here and there, and the pressure would start up again from different people to stop being so smart and successful. It was painful, and it caused me a lot of heartache.

I never understood why it wasn’t ok for me to be smart, talented or successful, but it was clear from the messages of teachers, fellow students, and later colleagues and bosses that I’d better knock it off or else. It happened in classes in high school. It came from professors and classmates in college. It came from sexist bosses in my high tech career.

By the way, this never came from my parents or my larger extended family. In fact, my parents raised me exactly the opposite. They encouraged me to be smart, strong and capable. My sisters and female cousins turned out that way.

But for me, I guess I was more sensitive to the pressures around me. It was painful to experience so much negativity and dislike of who I was, so I learned to hide it.

And I got so good at pretending to be someone less threatening and more agreeable to the people around me, that by the time I was married I was sabotaging my own success before someone else could convince me to do so.

Over my twenties, I downshifted myself from being a financially independent educated woman with a full-time career to taking less and less skilled positions with less and less pay and essentially becoming financially dependent on my ex-husband. I turned him and our marriage into an excuse not to succeed at my dreams.

I become the person I thought I was supposed to be in order to be loved, accepted and not tormented.

I got so good at giving my power away, that I lost sight of the fact that it was me doing it all along.

There were many times in my marriage where I felt I “had no choice” but to go along with things that didn’t support my dreams and goals. I see now that I had many more choices than I was willing to consider at the time.

I was afraid to be too smart, successful or capable because I was afraid I would no longer be loved.

It was right around when I turned 30 that I started journeying back to my truth. I decided that being true to myself was more important than being loved for pretending to be someone else. I realized I wanted children, and this was something I had been in denial about in order to keep peace in my marriage. I also realized I truly, deeply wanted a challenging, stimulating career where I had the freedom to work as fast and as creatively as I felt like, where I wasn’t holding myself back trying to please others.

In my 30th year, I launched my business, and I started putting my truth first.

As you can imagine, this did not bode well for a marriage built on agreements I made, spoken and unspoken, that didn’t honor my truth. I became a different person, but really I became myself. It was really hard letting go of the relationship that had defined my life in my 20’s. I didn’t think I had the option to break the commitment I made, so I tried to make it work despite how painful it was. I put it off as long as possible, until the pain in my body, a reflection of the pain in my spirit, disabled me (temporarily, thank goodness) and forced us both to find new ways to get our needs met.

Then I was free, angry, hurting and frightened.

I had to do a lot of work to forgive myself for being untrue for so long and for compromising in so many ways that weren’t right for me so I would be loved and accepted.

And I did all the work.

I stepped into my own shoes, and I healed. I got used to sharing the truth about who I am with family, friends and everyone else. I learned how to ask for and receive help. I became whole. I kept growing my business. But that little fear that “something out there” preventing me from being successful could still trip me up kept worrying me in quiet moments.

Until yesterday when I realized that what had been making the choices to hold me back all along was me.

So I gave that part of myself a big hug and thanks for trying to protect me for so long. I told her it was time to go now, as I am no longer afraid to be my smart, capable, creative self and be successful.

And a wave of peace, hope and knowing that I am already successful washed over me.

Listening to my heart when it says to slow down

I've been in a reflective mood since the beginning of this month. Mid-2011 marked the end of a 10 year period in my life where the people in my day-to-day life were much different than now.  September 2001 was momentous for me, not just due to the tragedy on September 11th, but for my wedding on September 1st that year.   

So much has changed in my life and in our country since then. Read my post about the impact September 11, 2001 had on my life and the lessons I learned eventually.

As I've been pausing to remember and reflect, a crucial message came through from my heart - SLOW DOWN.  

As I listened to my heart I discovered that I am not comfortable offering you the Heart-centered Entrepreneur Apprenticeship in the same way as I did in the past. 

My heart wants to slow it down, to offer you the first part of the program this fall and the second part in the winter. Not only that, my heart doesn't want to rush into starting immediately.  

So, we'll begin the Heart-centered Entrepreneur Apprenticeship on October 15, 2011 instead.  At that time, we'll do the first part of the apprenticeship, Clearing your Path for Success. 

You'll still have the opportunity to tailor the program based on what best meets your needs: the basic program with emails, general discussion and online forum, the mastermind group, and/or private coaching with me.  Read on for more specifics.

Is there anything in your life or business that you are rushing? Does your heart want you to slow down? 

Remembering September 11, 2001

My heart is feeling raw this morning.

I remember laying in bed that morning after my husband of 10 days left for work. I was looking up through the windows at the gorgeous September morning, the sky a beautiful, vivid blue with only a few puffy clouds slowly sliding by. I was content, blissful, so happy in every cell of my body, enjoying the honeymoon phase after my wedding. I was probably watching my wedding ring sparkle in the sunlight, as I laid there for a few moments soaking up the sunshine, my joy and all being right in my world.

Then my sister called and told me to turn on the television. And my bliss shattered.

It was replaced by confusion, fear, grief as I watched the live television coverage of what was happening in NYC. I was riveted for hours, as many were. The ripple effects, the layers of grief for all who died, all who lost, all who were affected became a dark shadow drowning me. The light in my husband’s eyes went out, and it rarely came back for more than a few seconds at a time over the next 7 years.

My honeymoon was over, and the innocent joy of all being right in my world was gone. The simple bliss of that morning never returned to my married life. The tragedy tore us apart, as one’s grief and depression is a lonely affair. We grew apart in so many ways, and we never recaptured that joyfulness again. Each year together grimmer than the previous.

Three summers ago, we finally divorced. The pain of those years of suffering had fully taken over my body. I was disabled with pain, and I could no longer hold my world together and keep the dream alive. I surrendered to defeat and failure. I had believed that love was enough to weather any tragedy or storm, and I was wrong.

And I was left behind, trapped in my body with all that pain. For six months, I waited for the pain to stop so I could start living again. One day I realized I had been waiting for years to start living again, and seven years had passed me by. It started to dawn on me that joy and peace were not going to find me while I sat around dwelling on pain and disappointment.

It was up to me to find them.

I decided it had been long enough. It was time to stop letting my life be defined by pain, grief and disappointment over shattered dreams. It was time to start living again. The journey to joy, for me, started with a new kind of surrender. I accepted that at this moment in time my body and spirit are in extreme pain after years suffering.

I discovered that pain and suffering are not the same thing.

Simple acts of kindness towards myself and being fully present to experience them replaced the suffering with peace. I took baby step after baby step, constantly checking in with myself. “What do I need in this moment? What kindness can I give myself in this moment?” Those days, weeks, months of kindness and self-love added up. Despite the physical pain in my body, peace, contentment, even joy slipped back into my life. No longer were they based on external circumstances, who loved and wanted me, or lack of pain. They came from a place directly inside of me that is not dependent on anything else to exist. I found them when I treated myself with loving-kindness.

I hadn’t known how powerful I had been all along to cultivate peace, love, joy and bliss in my daily life by simply acting with a loving intention.

I realized that, like keeping love alive in a relationship, personal happiness is an active, dynamic process. It requires daily commitment and discipline to cultivate. It needs tending like a garden, making choices throughout each day to be kind and loving towards oneself and others in thought, action and deed. In fact, the two go hand in hand, by treating oneself and others well, it is easy to keep happiness and love thriving. Throw in some daily gratitude for what you have instead of dwelling on what you don’t, and your heart grows in it’s capacity to experience love and joy. No matter what the circumstances are around your life today.

What happened September 11, 2011 changed me in profound ways. I am not sure I would have the depth, compassion and awareness I have now without that loss of innocence. I may not have suffered long and hard enough to learn that suffering is just an illusion, a creation of the mind, as the Buddhists say. My lesson learned reminds me of my favorite quote from the Charge of the Goddess by Doreen Valiente:

"If you find not what you seek within, you will never find it without."

Remembrance

Remembrance is a practice where you invite the Divine into your heart to fill you with the Love, Courage, Strength etc.. you need to cross any of those scary bridges in life between where you are now and where you need to be.

It's a simple practice. First you center yourself in your body, allowing yourself to relax and focus inward. If you like, you can place your hand over your hard. The simply call on the Divine in your heart with a name that resonates for you. It might be God, Goddess, Great Spirit, Ohm or even your own name. I call on the Divine with the name Amma which to me means, Mother.

I like to picture my heart as a castle and courtyard encompassed by a wall that keeps my heart safe. When I need support, I envision going to a back gate at the edge of my garden, and I call out to Amma asking her to join me. I envision this lovely, older lady walking up the path and coming into my garden. She comes in, sits down and over a cup of tea we talk about what’s bothering me, what I need. Her presence is so nurturing and soothing. I feel better just having her near, and the longer we sit together the more clarity and comfort I get about what’s been troubling me.

It seems to me that when I am ready to cross one of those scary bridges, she holds my hand and walks with me. Insights, new perspectives, healing happens gently as we cross the bridge. That’s what Remembrance is like for me.

The Remembrance is from the Sufi tradition, and I learned it from Mark Silver. Apparently, there are many names for God in the Sufi tradition, and one of those names is Ash-Shakur. The story with this name is that in the beginning there was just God. God wanted to be able to see, experience and appreciate all aspects of itself so God created all the creations in the Universe. Ash-Shakur is the name for God that means "One who Appreciates".

I learned and practiced this technique when I went out to Portland, Oregon in February 2011 for a seminar with Mark Silver. As we leaned back (metaphorically and physically) into the Source in Remembrance and asked for Appreciation, we were amazed how easily and powerfully we received it! It never failed to fill our hearts with a sense of being unconditionally loved. And, wow what things you feel you can accomplish and experience when you are held in that place!

This technique is so easy, and I have been teaching it to everyone I've encountered since my return from Portland! It's been an "Ah-ha!" experience for all whom I've shared it with.

Here's my version of how to lean back into the Source for Appreciation and support.

1. Relax

Begin by sitting somewhere comfortable where you won't be disturbed for 5 minutes or so. Take some slow, gentle breaths and release any tension in your body.

2. Check in with your Heart

Bring your attention to your heart center. Check in and see what you are experiencing at this moment. Trust and make space for however you are feeling - whatever it is - it's ok. Just acknowledge how you feel and allow it to exist.

3. Connect with the Source

With your attention in your heart center, ask the Source to come forth and be present in your heart. The way we learned was to repeat a name of Source that resonates with us. For me, it's "Mah", but choose something that works for you. Repeat the Name in your heart a few times and gently let your heart open to receive this connection.

4. Ask for Appreciation

Share the feelings you discovered a few minutes ago in your heart with the Source. Pour your heart out to the Source if you need to. Once it's all been acknowledged, simply ask to receive Appreciation. Keep breathing with a soft heart and allow yourself to receive whatever comes. For some it may just be a peaceful feeling, for others a vision, and for others maybe a song or words. Allow yourself to lean back and receive this Appreciation, knowing you held by the Source.

Talk about what you do

I hope you had a relaxing long weekend!

I was busy preparing for fall in so many ways, but I had plenty of time to relax too. I finished a book for book club this week and even had time to make a delicious soup. I also helped my sister prepare for the arrival of my new niece or nephew and dusted off and polished up something else close to my heart: the Heart-centered Entrepreneur Apprenticeship.

The new, improved Heart-centered Entrepreneur Apprenticeship includes the basic program: 6 weeks of Clearing your Path for Success, 6 weeks of Six Steps for Success, and 12 weeks access to the Heart-centered Entrepreneur Forum, but there are also some premium options now: a Mastermind Group and Private Coaching with me. Contact me if you're interested!

Today, I want to talk about what you do. It's the activity from Day 4 of the Buff your Business! Bootcamp. Building and maintaining a successful business requires the same kind of discipline as a fitness routine, as consistency is the key to success. Showing up every day for your business is just as important as showing up every day to your yoga mat.

Watch today's video here!

When someone asks you what do you do, are you someone who responds with "Ummm", your day job position title, or something vague like "I work for myself?" If you answer with "I'm a massage therapist" or "I'm a designer", you are getting closer to the truth but are still hiding behind these labels.

It is really important for heart-centered entrepreneurs to learn how to talk about what they do in a way that goes beyond vague, beyond merely factual description.

A heart-centered entrepreneur needs to be able to reach right out and touch someone by resonating with their heart with their words about the gifts they offer.

Using clear, revealing, heart-centered language can be scary on a number of levels, but it is so important to practice, practice, practice until it's as easy as saying your name. Telling people what you actually do is so important, even if it makes you feel vulnerable at first.

Let me give you an example by using myself. If I responded to what do you do with "I'm a business coach for holistic practitioners", what does that really tell you? Probably that I know something about some kind of business, but not really much to give you a clue to go on about what I actually do with my clients.

Instead, if I said to you - "I help heart-centered professionals develop the skills and courage they need to live a healthy, happy lifestyle that is fully supported by their heart-centered business."

Wow! The second one there is a lot more specific and descriptive. If any part of that resonates with you, you are going to have questions. You might want to know how I do that or what kind of businesses do my clients have or even what kind of skills I am teaching my clients. The questions are the point, though!

Questions start a conversation, and a conversation is a great opportunity for you to hone your communication style and talk about what you do.

A potential client could be searching for you anywhere. Think of all the people out there who need you but who don't know you can help them or don't know how to reach you. It's ok, even important, to tell everyone what you do, even if someone is not your ideal client, because they may have a friend, relative or neighbor needs what you can provide. The more your community knows who you are and what you do, the easier it will be for new clients to find you.

So how do you put together a specific answer to the what do you do question?

Well, sometimes this is called an elevator pitch (from back in the days when someone had 1 minute on an elevator to pitch an idea to the boss). Think of it today like condensing your message into a status update - clear, direct, concise and to the point.

Here's a formula for your offer:

"I help (describe ideal client in 1-3 words)(action) (solution to ideal client problems) so they can (reach goals or alleviate pain)."

It also will help to be prepared to answer follow up questions asking for details on how, why and when you help people so you can hold up your end of the ensuing conversation. The more you talk about what you do, the easier it gets. Also, talking about what you do generates excitement, interest and energy around you.

Tell 3 new people what you do today. Feel free to run it by a friend or colleague first for feedback.

Download your own copy of the Buff your Business! Bootcamp and join the Forum here.

If you're not feeling confident about your business and need support in identifying your ideal clients, crafting your offer, and communicating from the heart to your audience, the Heart-centered Entrepreneur Apprenticeship is where to start. The next program starts September 25th.

If you'd like to learn how to listen to your heart, get clarity about your path and hone your meditation and visioning skills, the Clearing Your Path for Success Learn-at-home Programis what you need. The Premium version of this program is included in the Apprenticeship, but the E-program includes a workbook and 5 guided meditations set to inspirational music that you can do at home by yourself or with a buddy.